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The Fortune Ritual
Have you ever dreamed of becoming rich like one of these celebrities but you didn’t want to do any work? Well, then this ritual is for you. By completing this ritual, you will become overpoweringly rich. If you manage to succeed, that is. Make sure you obtain a 100 dollar bill that is around perfect condition before starting the ritual. This is critical to your success when playing the game. To start the ritual, you must locate a money god. You can do this by going to any bank in your country. Head there when the bank is open. Once you arrive, go to the counter where you normally withdraw cash and get in line. You will notice that everyone will look very afraid to be in line and the usual bank operator should be gone. In his/her place should be a blonde haired woman who is wearing a red sweater with stars on it and a pair of blue jeans. She will look very ancient. She is one of the great money gods. It has to be her or another god. You will just know if the person is. If it’s a normal person at the desk then just leave and try again tomorrow. Don’t let any of the god’s appearances fool you; they are actually gods of massive power that won’t hesitate to kill you if you provoke them in any way. I’ll use her in this example of the ritual. Once she serves you, scream so everyone in the bank can hear you “I wish to take the fortune challenge.” She and everyone else will look very frustrated upon hearing this. She will then question you “Are you sure you want to play?” This is your final chance to leave, if you feel like you can’t go through with this ritual then say “No, I have changed my mind.” She will simply nod three times and after the third nod is finished, you can start heading out. Otherwise, shout to the woman “Yes, I wish to play the game.” Do not look fearful when saying this or she will refuse your offer. If she accepts your offer, she will ask you kindly for that one hundred dollar bill that you have been carrying all this time. Do not refuse to give it to her because that will provoke her and she will do with you as she sees fit. She might trap you in an alternate realty and let you drive yourself insane. She might just kill you on the spot and hide your body. For your own safety, just hand her the bill. As soon as you give her the bill, the fortune game will begin and she will explain the rules. Pay attention, if by any reason you break a rule when the game is in progress, don’t bother running, you are already as good as dead. She will then grab both of your hands. Do not resist. After she lets go, she will force you to close your eyes and count to ten. Do not cheat. During this time, she will flee with the bill. Now that I have explained how to start the ritual, the next topic is the game itself. The goal of the game is quite simple; all you need to do to win the game is to find the woman that processes the one hundred dollar bill. But wait, it gets way more complicated than this. The rules 1 you cannot use any type of device that tracks her location, 2 you have only forty eight hours to find the god. 3 do not wonder off and go do other stuff, finish the ritual first. 4 do not do the ritual as a group; this act will offend the god greatly. 5 similarly, do not let anyone else assist you in the ritual. 6 Lastly, do not ever attempt to trick, lie, attack, cheat or taunt the god, no matter what. The god will know what you are doing and it will murder you swiftly. Now, remember me saying the better condition the dollar bill is in, the more you are likely to survive. Well, here’s why. The more crumpled the dollar bill is, the stronger the god becomes and the smarter the god becomes at avoiding you. Say you got only four percent of your bill crumped; the god will only use basic tactics to avoid you like walking, running, etc. However, if you got most of your bill folded up, you will have close to a zero chance of success. You might as well just stop the ritual right there and await your fate. If you somehow manage to find the woman, quickly ran up to her and say in a fierce voice “I have won, now bestow upon me what I seek.” After saying this she will decide if you are truly worthy of obtaining her gift. The outcome of the ritual will vary depending on her choice. If she finds you worthy, she will start to cast a spell on you. Don’t worry, it’s painless. Once she’s done she will say “goodbye, use my gift well” and then vanish in a pile of coins. Upon returning to your everyday life, you will notice that money will appear to come to you. You might become famous with little effort and then the cash will start to roll in. you might win the lottery with a single try. This blessing will last a lifetime so enjoy the gift. Congratulations, you have successfully completed the ritual. However, if she doesn’t find you worthy enough then you better start running. She will say “you are not worthy enough for my gift, now pay up.” She will then pursue you for the rest of your life. If she manages to catch you, you will become her toy and be tortured endlessly until you die. Well, what are you waiting for? Come down and play the fortune game, you might just become rich. Written by skyrim90000 Category:BCP Category:Pastas Category:Pretense Category:Rituals